And so the agonising task of going through book one begins. I should explain for those who don’t know, this is book one of my five book series of novels (published this year, that’s the plan.) I’ve written the first, and I’ve spent the last year or so writing the second. And since I finished writing the second last week I’ve been dragging my feet, putting off going over the first and re-drafting it and fiddling with it and making it ready for the publishers because I know what a mammoth task it is. I fear it. I love it, because it’s my books, and I love my books. But I don’t half fear it. Even now I’m on here, blogging, instead of starting properly. 31 minutes past 2 in the afternoon, and I’ve done nothing! Crap! I’ve looked at the first page, had a panic and then ran to this wesbite. This blog is fast becoming my haven.
My main issue at the moment is the opening line of dialect. There’s a sentence of simple prose, no speech, which is fine. Then there’s the first line of speech. The first line of speech in the whole book, in the whole five book series! What pressure. At the moment it’s a bit glib and just a bit sort of throw away I feel. So then I thought I would change it to something meaningful, something really deep that foretells everything that is to come. But then I thought, from the character’s p.o.v, the line at the moment is very fitting. He is quite a glib, cheeky character. He’s important, sure, but he is quite cocky, he makes throw away remarks. The line is exactly what he would say. But it just doesn’t look that impressive for the first line of speech. But……but……..
When I first started writing these books, ooh, four years ago now (blimey,) it felt like the most natural thing in the world to write. I remember writing that first chapter, and that first line of speech just fell out of my brain and onto the page. I never questioned it. But now I’m so riddled with panic and insecurity about how good it is, how good the book is, will people like it, have people done the same thing but better, it’s awful. I read the book Russell T. Davies wrote about writing Doctor Who, and he said in there about how much writers fear their own work because they’re terrified of how it will turn out, and that’s definately true. Infact, if you’re a writer, I recommend that book, I was going through it going “yes that’s me!”
Anyway, enough plugging. I don’t know what to do. Keep the line, change the line. Keep it and risk it being thrown straight in the bin at the editors office (they’re that harsh,) or change it and risk it sounding a bit pompous, a bit overblown and a bit out of character.
I knew this blogging business was popular for a reason. Without even knowing it, I’ve just given myself my answer.